the attic

"I still believe that peace and plenty and happiness can still be worked out in some way. I am a fool." Kurt Vonnegut

hi im cat. you know where to find me.

please be as weird as me please be as weird as me please be as weird as me

—me every time I meet someone 

(Source: miel-lapin, via la-mepunk)

help thunder!

help thunder!

right now:

thunderstorm is brewing outside my treehouse and Stella firmly squished under my bed.
I’m wishing for ice cream. I have no ice cream. I have no food of any kind. my kitchen is a barren wasteland…just like my soul.
(kidding about the soul. my soul is pretty alright if you ask me)

it’s no longer a “rest stop” it’s now a “text stop”. 
oh world, you crazy place you.

it’s no longer a “rest stop” it’s now a “text stop”.
oh world, you crazy place you.

victory

for a person who hates crowds as much as i do, it’s a wonder that i feel so at home in NYC. it’s most likely because there’s a comforting anonymity in a city that size, with everyone so preoccupied with their own shit there’s really no need to worry about being noticed. 

it is a small victory this road trip of mine. being alone in a small town, and Newport is a small town that’s the truth, a gorgeous, wealthy, entitled small town, the history is amazing and everything is old and haunted my it’s own little army of ghosts, i loved it but it was an intimidating place to be alone. I did meet a friend. a girl. she was lovely and we hit it off and had easy conversation like a couple of old pals, so nice, and exchanged info for future travel adventures. friends in foreign cities are great to have in your back pocket, just in case. (we are insta buds now, and she seems to love horses too, and we are both obsessed with Disclosure. kindreds!)

the show was beautiful. i hadn’t seen Band of Horses since 2007 when i saw them at a smallish venue in Toronto, and between BoH and RA i wandered and found Hamilton Leithauser playing a small show in a brick building i was walking past. i could hear his voice and followed it into a room that had a vaulted ceiling, chairs set up like a church, and Hamilton and another guy on guitars. his voice was ethereal. it was one of the most beautiful shows i think i have ever seen, and i was sorry to have to get up and leave to go hear Ryan. (never thought i’d say that) it sucked that they overlapped. when people started getting up and leaving i felt so bad because he was doing something so real and heartfelt and beautiful i moved up closer to newly vacated seats to hear one more song. Hamilton Leithauser, you are a total babe with a unreal voice. i don’t think i’ve heard better. his range is like…wow. i love that new solo album. 

of course i did leave to hear Ryan though as he was the whole reason for my road trip. and so worth it. i think that this was my favorite show of all time. he was funny and charming and sang so beautifully. the setting was pretty perfect too. he sang several songs that almost made me cry, but i held on tightly to my feelings and didn’t let them run amok. i couldn’t be the girl alone at the show and sobbing, now could i? well i could, but i wasn’t. thank god. how embarrassing. and here i just wanted to go unnoticed. there was a camera on the stage filming the crowd etc (my nightmare) and the last thing i wanted was so be seen by that lens. i tried to duck behind this taller guy in front of me whenever i saw it, but i was standing on a slight hill, great for the view, not great for being undercover. 

the sun was just starting to sink as he sang Come Pick Me Up. it truly was a perfect moment. 

thank you Ryan for a lovely show. and thanks for “trying hard”. can’t wait for the Toronto date. i’ll be there. 

oh and thanks Charlie. 

from one who has lost so many, some for the better and some to regret, i can truly say i agree with this with all my heart. 
reading this broke my heart a little. 

from one who has lost so many, some for the better and some to regret, i can truly say i agree with this with all my heart. 

reading this broke my heart a little. 

(Source: meganmcisaac)

this song. 

wow. Hozier is playing the Newport Folk Festival and I am sad I’ll miss it, but it’s time to go back to Toronto and my job that I feel like I bailed on in the middle of us filming a giant episode with me establishing a ton of new looks for the BG. 

no rest for the….background coordinator. 

Ryan tonight.

Ryan tonight.

I’m adventuring.
wish I coulda safely taken pictures of my drive here, it was so beautiful.

today after my zillion production meetings…

i was going to cancel my road trip as this upcoming episode is insane with a ton of BG to dress in very specific looks and i’m pretty sure my assistant wants to steal my job (she actually is more qualified than me but i am damned good at the styling and pulling the looks not to mention the background love me) but after seeing Ryan’s setlist there’s no way in hell i am cancelling. 

he played a show in Maine (probably my favorite state next to NY) and there are new songs. new songs oh god. 

ok sleep now Cat. sleep now, one more day then….lobster rolls or ftw. 

i had the craziest dream

you know how sometimes dreams are so real and the subject matter is realler than your life (yes settle down smarties, i know realler is no word, but it’s my time now so hush) and you dream about things that are happening or about to happen and you intertwine your hopes and your realities and have these amazing sparklefest concoctions happen behind your eyelids? well i just had one about my road trip, which as i’ve mentioned before, i am nervous about, but also excited, and i think i need the alone time (8 hours in the car) until i reach my destination then yikes a zillion strangers (i probably outstrange them all)….whoa. it’s too realistic. it felt so real and then i woke up for no reason and saw a tweet that made me feel so surreal that now i don’t know what awake and asleep is. what’s a dream or what is real. 

i have to be at the studio in a few hours. i wish i was dreaming that but i know i am not. but tomorrow is the last day of work for me before a much needed spiritual journey. i am going to see the Atlantic again soon and it feels like i’m going home somehow. 

Music expresses that which cannot be put into words and that which cannot remain silent.

—Victor Hugo 

(Source: observando, via danstepich)

it’s 4:20 am

and I’m getting up to go to the studio to dress my first background who are in at 6. I’m exhausted.
yesterday my call time was 4:30 so I was up at 3 am so at least today I could sleep in. yuck.
coffee me please universe.
set life. too early. zzz